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Oh, Brother: Dealing with Sibling Rivalry

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Simply turn off the TV and tell the kids that it needs a time out. As they get older, their fights may get uglier and more physical, including hitting and name-calling. Don't make one child the villain in those situations - sometimes the hitter or name-caller has been provoked and teased at length and finally lashes out. In this case, both children are in the wrong. And in every case, the hitter should be punished - no negotiations. Remember that accidents do happen when kids are playing physical games, but reinforce that there should be a magic word - such as "stop" that should keep play from getting to an uncomfortable physical level. To prevent blowups, make an effort to spend at least 15 minutes of one-on-one time with each child, every day. Give them the words to express frustration so that they don't resort to verbal abuse, and establish boundaries and consequences for breaching those boundaries.